Rigby Is 'In the Closet' - Chapter 5 - Part 1

The cool breeze danced on her shoulders as Eileen gazed at the streets. Rays of light shined down on the pavement while people strolled down the city streets, scavenging the shops for products and goods. At some Mexican restaurant, she saw a couple kissing; their mouths enveloping one another like they were practicing French kissing. She immediately looked away in disgust and stared at her own reflection on the side view mirror. She kept thinking of how to impress Rigby even more tonight at her dad's restaurant, Spaghatta's. Different scenarios kept popping into her mind, but she mainly imagined herself kissing Rigby; feeling the fur from the top of his lips as she becomes loss from the embracement of his love. Yeah, the thought in her opinion was a little over the top, but she always wanted to kiss someone as short and kind like herself. And Rigby was the man.

Minutes passed and while she was cruising with Margaret in the Beetle car, Eileen kept mesmerizing the sky. She gazed upon the stars that formed shapes and sizes due to her imagination. She was able to detect a heart in the faintly lit sky; with some stars in the middle of the imaginary 'heart'. This 'image' from the sky reminded her of something that happened this morning; and yet she didn't want to discuss it with anyone, especially Margaret. She held her emotions back and gazed at Margaret, who was to the left of her.

'Gosh… she's so pretty… I can see how and why he likes her… but me…'

Eileen looked back at the side view mirror and examined herself. She lowered her eyes down and sighed under her breath.

'I can never compare to Margaret's looks… oh Rigby…'

Eileen kept casting looks over at Margaret and realized that the avian was staring at her front mirror. She guessed that Margaret was looking at Mordecai and Rigby, who was trailing behind their beetle car. So the curious beaver glanced behind her and noticed that Rigby was squinting right at Margaret. Just by the look of it, she could tell that he looked ticked off.

'Huh, that's weird… Why would he be giving dirty looks toward Margaret? I don't ge…'

Without warning, the 'image' that she neglected earlier came back to haunt her. She sadly relived and felt the moment of what happened at the coffee shop this morning.


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She remembered herself lifting that crumpled up and rusty napkin, from the seat where her beloved one sat at, and gaping at the sight of jagged marks on the coffee stained table. The deep marks were shaped like a heart and the 'heart' surrounded two letters and a plus sign. It only took a couple of letters to break down Eileen's heart into pieces.

'M+R'

Eileen froze there and dreaded from the sight. Her legs wobbled and her eyes widened. She wished that she hadn't seen it at all. But the possible, secret relationship popped into her cautious self thought as she came up with a sudden conclusion.

'Margaret + Rigby'

'…but… but… why? Why would he do this to me? Why would Rigby do that to him? Would she try to take my man? I don't… I d-'


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"Hey Eileen, do we take a right or left here? I forgot."

Eileen opened her eyes and saw that they were approaching a stoplight. They were at Richards Road and were supposed to cross over to Dilly Road.

"Ummm, go to your left."

"Thanks Eileen, I don't know what I would have done without you!"

Margaret pulled over to the left turning lane and turned on the blinker. Eileen fumbled with her thumbs and stared at them. Ever since this morning, she's been dealing with the thought that her best friend could be going for Rigby, or he was going for her. But she wasn't a hundred percent sure of this. Nevertheless, she didn't want to ignore the possibility.

She felt her make-up plastered face and then looked at Margaret's flawless face. Even her beak was shiny perfect. Eileen was frustrated at the fact that she tried so hard to impress Rigby with her looks and make-up, yet Margaret was still prettier.

"So Eileen, I'm so grateful that your father opened the place for us tonight. That's very sweet of him."

"Yeah, he's the best!" She looked off to the side. "Ummm… Margaret, can I ask you something?"

Margaret regained focus after staring at the front mirror. "Yeah, what is it Eileen?"

Eileen fumbled with her thumbs again. "Well… you know that I like Rigby, right?"

"Ummm… yeah. We've talked about this before. Don't you remember?"

"Well… yeah, but…" Eileen hesitated but then spoke out, "What do you think about him?"

Margaret looked forward and grimaced at the thought of Rigby. She couldn't stand who the raccoon was. In fact, she never understood why Eileen liked him in the first place. In her opinion, Rigby was an immature freak of nature who needed to grow up and stop acting like a fool. She wanted to make the raccoon suffer from being so obnoxious to her, ever since the first time she met him in middle school and what he did to her then. (But that's a story for later…) She only acted nice to Rigby only if Mordecai was nearby, since she didn't want to tick off Mordecai and hurt his feelings.

Ever since that time she heard that voicemail from Mordecai's butt dialing, talking about him and her falling in love and such, she knew that he was in love with her. (Butt dialing episode.) But… she didn't feel the same way about him… yet. She found it fun pulling on the innocent bird's strings. However, this didn't mean she was making Mordecai a fool. She just wanted to get close to him too because Mordecai was very special to her. The only problems that she had with Mordecai were that she's use to dating tough guys, not a softy, and that Mordecai was best friends with the one she hated.

The beautiful avian put on a fake smile and spoke with an optimistic tone of voice,

"I think Rigby is alright Eileen! He's perfect for you! You two were meant to be together." Margaret lied to her, only to hide her true feelings about Rigby.

Eileen blushed but then was troubled at how Margaret said it.

'That kind of sounded… sarcastic… They better not act like they're not in love or… I'll…'

She looked away from Margaret and looked upon the streets again, with worrisome eyes. She wouldn't know what to do if the 'secret' relationship was true. But all she could do was hope that Rigby could see the true beauty over her make-up plastered face.


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Mordecai was jamming out to rock songs from Fist Pump while driving behind their dates. He looked over at Rigby and saw him slouching and staring forward. The raccoon looked a little ticked and at the same time very tired.

"Come on Rigby, rock with me Dude!"

Rigby snapped out of it and looked directly at Mordecai. "Oh, sorry man... To tell ya the truth, I'm not really feelin'… it."

Mordecai reached over and twisted the knob to lower the music volume.

'Rigby not rocking out? That's weird.'

"You alright dude? I'm starting to think something's bothering you."

"Nah man, I'm alright, just been zoning a lot. That's all." Mordecai turned his head back forward and stared at the back of the beetle. He contemplated on what's really wrong with Rigby.

'Gosh… Rigby and I are finally out on an actual group dates with Margaret and Eileen… and he... I… I know something's not right with him… He never zones this much in a day, especially during a special night like this…'

Mordecai glanced back at Rigby and noticed that he was still staring forward in the same position.

'What's he staring at?'

Mordecai locked his eyes forward and could only see the beetle with Eileen looking at the sky and the back of Margaret's head.

(Due to his position, Mordecai could not see Margaret glaring at Rigby, since the front mirror of her car was in a position that obscured Mordecai's vision from seeing her eyes.)

From what he could see, Mordecai guessed that he was staring down Eileen.

'Does… he have a problem with Eileen? Huh… weird…'

After a while of awkward silence and the low music playing, Mordecai decided that he should be saying something to help alleviate the awkward situation. He breathed in and out as they stopped at a stop light.

"Ummm… hey Rigby. You know if there's anything you ever wanna ask me, then say what's on your mind. No matter what, I will totally support you dude... ok?"

Mordecai got Rigby's attention as he flashed back to Mordecai. The raccoon started to get nervous as he began to ponder if he should tell what's really going on between him and Margaret? Or/and his secret feelings for his 'true love'?

Mordecai kept glancing back and forth between the road and Rigby while he drove, waiting for a response, whilst Rigby got lost in his thoughts. He couldn't help but to gaze at Mordecai's mesmerizing eyes.

'Anything?... 'Mordecai, I LOVE YOU! Margaret is a Selfish BITCH!… Imagine myself saying that to him?… Would he really… Humph… he wouldn't understand. He probably would get mad at me anyways, no matter what I say. Everything would be ruined for me if I told... No… I'm not risking anything right now.'

He sighed and looked down at his white tie.

'But what should I say? He's waiting for me to say something! Oh wait, I got it!'

Rigby put on his snazzy face and played with his tie.

"I've been thinking of what tie to wear on our next date with Eileen and Margaret. But, I can't think of anything good enough to wear compared to this tie right here!" He pointed to his tie. Mordecai glanced down and saw Rigby posing with his white and shiny tie. He smiled and lowered his eyes down at the snazzy raccoon.

'Rigby, the show-off. He does look dashing with that tie on though. But… what tie color or style would he look better with?'

"Well, you could wear a…" Mordecai looked off to the side and started thinking of colors.

'Orange? I can see that color on Rigby.'

He then speculated Eileen, who was still gazing at the stars. He came up with the idea for a tie as he exclaimed,

"Oh dude! What about an orange colored tie with yellow stars on it?"

Rigby put on a confused face to Mordecai's advice.

"Ummm, dude… that is so GAY!" Rigby started to laugh and soon Mordecai realized how ridiculous his suggestion was and started laughing with him. After a while, they settled down. Mordecai wiped a tear off and breathed out.

"Whew, man. I can really picture you wearing that! That would be hilarious dude! But seriously, maybe a nice orange tie would do you some good."

"Nah man, I think that a red tie would do well for me."

Mordecai shrugged and then shook his head in agreement. He didn't really care what tie color Rigby chose. He was just happy that he was able to make Rigby laugh. When Rigby was happy, Mordecai was happy.

Rigby sighed and looked off to the side. He was still was worried about Margaret telling Mordecai of what happened at the theatre. Nevertheless, he knew that laughing and spending time with Mordecai, his best friend, was a good way to stop his glaring game towards Margaret. Besides, if they are all sitting at the same table tonight, then there would be a less likely chance of Margaret telling of what happened at the theatre.

He reaches over to the knob and turns up the rock music. Mordecai flashes at Rigby's sudden comeback as the raccoon started fist pumping.

"LET'S ROCK MORDECAI!" So, Rigby and Mordecai rocked out to the music shouting, "FIIIIIIISSSST PUUUUUMP!" while throwing their fists in the air.

Eventually, they turned around a corner and drove into the parking lot of Spaghatta's.


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The first thought that crossed their mind was… 'Whoa, this place is crowded.' Fancy cars were parked everywhere, taking up most of the spaces as each car was parallel row by row to the white lines. When Mordecai and Rigby were able to park, they could see a huge crowd of waiting customers in front of the entrance.

The two went up and waited at the entrance doors, standing away from the crowd and keeping their own space. Far off from the distance, they could hear Eileen shouting,

"HEY YOU GUYS! WE'RE COMING!"

They examined Eileen stumbling with her heels again and Margaret sort of supporting her while walking behind. The avian shouted,

"Hey Mordecai! Long time no see!" She giggled at her own joke. Mordecai hesitated a little and laughed at the joke she made.

"H… hey Margaret! Yeah, long time no see!" Mordecai went up and greeted her and Eileen, while Rigby, putting on his 'I care' act, tagged along. Eileen waved towards him and then, once again, 'tripped'. Nevertheless, she was caught by the 'lucky' raccoon. Rigby sighed and rolled his eyes while Eileen blushed. "Gosh Rigby, I'm so Clumsy, ain't I?"

"Oh yeah Eileen, you sure are quite the catch!" She giggled and blushed even more while Rigby gave a huge fake smile.

'Ok, someone please kill me for making that joke.'

Margaret and Mordecai helped Rigby with Eileen as they all got themselves situated. While waiting in line for their reservations to be checked, Rigby stared at Margaret and tugged her dress. Margaret looked down at the annoying raccoon.

"Yes Rigby, what do you need?"

"Margaret, we need to talk for a second. You don't mind, right?"

Margaret grunted and went off to the sides with Rigby while Mordecai and Eileen held their spots in line. Rigby motioned her to stop and brought his brows down.

"Margaret… *sigh*… look. I want us to forget about what happened earlier and move on. But if you still insist on telling Mordecai about what happened, I'll tear you do-"

Margaret chuckled and gave him a cold grin.

"Oh Rigby. I might tell or not, but you can't do anything about it, now will you? *Pssh* besides, you're such a waste of time. So… why should I waste my breath on a matter about you?" She smirked and scuffed at his feeble warning. Rigby clenched his fists while his teeth grind each other.

"Just understand that you've been warned, bitch." And with that statement, he stomped away from her and went back in line, where Eileen held onto Rigby's arm with confidence. Margaret soon followed back and ignored Rigby's ticked off face.

When the host allowed them to enter after waiting in line, all four of them walked past the crowd of people and pushed the crimson glass doors that lead to the inside. The restaurant had a warm feeling to it as the smell of Italian pizza and spaghetti settled all over the room. The lights were set low and dim while golden light bulbs, attach to a cord, hung above the dining tables. The gold colored walls were covered by French and Italian paintings while wine was stacked upon one another on the wooden drools. The carpet, seats, and the employees were all wearing crimson red with some sort of golden color. And to top it all off, Italian music were playing in the background to help accommodate the Italian culture of the restaurant.

When they walked in, Eileen told them to wait a sec as she went to the back of the restaurant and entered the hidden kitchen. A couple of minutes passed and she finally came out with her dad, a very polite and well-mannered mole who was tall yet skinny. He wore round glasses, a dark suit and management badge. The two walked up and greeted the other friends.

"Hello, I'm Eileen's father, Roger, and welcome to Spaghatta's! I'll be happy to show you to your tables." He looked down and examined Rigby.

"You must be Rigby. It's very nice to meet you sir!" Rigby continues his 'caring' act and shook hands with Roger. Then Eileen stood near Rigby and lends out her hand, as to where Rigby rolled his eyes but kept his act up as he held her hand. All four of them followed Roger to their tables. While walking down the carpeted floor, they avoided eye contact from all of the other fancy and wealthy diners, who stared them down and snorted.

Roger gladly presented them their table, which was only about 3 feet wide and 3 ½ feet long. Mordecai knew that this table was too small for the four of them.

"Mr. Roger, we all can't fit on this table. Is there… another table that we could use?"

"Yes, Mordecai, it's actually over there with those 'for two' booths. As of right now, you two can sit here and the other two can sit over there. I'm very sorry for the coincidence, but it's too crowded here for all four of you to sit at one table. This isn't a problem for you, right?"

"Ummm…" Mordecai realized that he was going to have to sit with Margaret… alone. Even though he was nervous, he was shouting for joy in his head.

'YES! My chance to be alone with her!'

He turned towards Margaret and only gave a smile, who also smiled back.

Eileen grabbed Rigby's shoulder before the troubled raccoon could protest. She commented,

"It's fine Dad. Rigby and I can sit at the booth! And you two can sit here. Thanks again Dad!"

She immediately started pulling on Rigby's hand towards their reserved booth. Rigby resisted a little and glanced back. He saw the two birds, one of them calm and the other obviously nervous, settling themselves at their table.

'Oh no, oh no, oh shit! This can be Margaret's perfect chance to tell Mordecai of what happened!'

Rigby blurted, "WAIT!" and pulled out of Eileen's forceful motives. He jogged to Margaret and Mordecai and stopped at their table. The two birds both looked at Rigby as they saw him stagger up and fix himself.

"Hey guys! I think we can all sit on this table, right? We can make it work out. Right dude?"

Rigby took second glances at Mordecai, who started giving secret signs that expressed, 'No, please let me sit with her alone.' Rigby could see the pleading eyes Mordecai were giving and understood how badly he wanted this opportunity. Rigby looked back at the both of them, sighed and slowly patted the table.

"Actually, what am I saying? We all can't fit at this table. So, you two enjoy your me-" and before he could finish, he was suddenly pulled back by Eileen, who seemed stronger and more ticked off. Rigby looked upon Mordecai, who gave him a 'thumbs up', and then at Margaret, who gave him the cold stare with an evil grin. She mouthed, 'Don't worry, pig" and looked back at Mordecai. Rigby could only moan in displeasure as he arrived at the booth with Eileen, about thirty feet away from the two love birds.


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With his hand holding his face up and eyes shifting between Eileen and the birds, Rigby groaned and drank some of his tea. He fiddled with his stale straw while Eileen continued to talk about political aspects on saving the environment and possibly promoting a new budget plan. Rigby didn't care what she had to say about political stuff, but he tried listening to Margaret's and Mordecai's conversation; which was very difficult due to the distant space between them. He could only pick out specific words and laughs that were exchanged to each other and it seemed like they were having a great time. Nevertheless, Rigby could see Mordecai's nervousness, since he's been best friends with him for so long. He's been able to pick up some of Mordecai's issues when he looks or feels different. The obvious shaking hands, his feet shifting in and out, and his brow that twitched about every forty-five seconds. Rigby, of course, wasn't weird of knowing this, but he was always interested in the 'one' he longed for.

The curious raccoon looked closely at Mordecai's face and examined how his feathers gleamed from the light above him. He zoned and imagined himself taking Margaret's place at the table. His imagination drove him to believe that he was sitting at the table, looking forward and seeing the avian who would have greeted him with a gentle kiss on his head. The fantasy he had pictured himself talking to Mordecai and the both them laughing and having a good time. No, he didn't imagine himself acting like a girl, like Margaret, but he was just being himself. The two of them held hands across the table while Rigby blushes from his infatuation for Mordecai. He looks around and sees all sorts of people smiling back and not judging who they were. When he turns back to stare at Mordecai, a female beaver's face pops in front of him.

"Hey Rigby, are you listening to me? I'm about to get to a good point! Since I've been reading those books on the theories of solving the market crisis, I've found one that really suits the key idea of fixing the economy. You want to hear it?"

Rigby's fantasy dream was already gone as drool was coming out of his mouth. Rigby snapped out of it and quickly flashed back to reality with Eileen, who greeted him with a cheesy grin. Rigby blinked a couple of times and finally settled his napkin on his lap quickly. He put his arm forward on the table and supported his head once again.

"Ok Eileen, tell me about it." In truth, Rigby had no idea what she just said, since he only focused on Mordecai before. Eileen talked for a straight five minutes about an economist named Paul Krugman and how his 'Alien Theory' would help the economy. Rigby only got the first couple of words before he glanced back and forth again.

Minutes passed and while Eileen started talking about the making of coffee, Rigby peeked at the two birds, whom have just gotten done ordering their meals. He looked at Margaret and he automatically started to worry about the blackmailing scheme once more.

'Is she gonna tell? If so, when?'

Simple questions with no answers bobbled his head before the waiter from the other table headed over to him and Eileen. Rigby couldn't see Margaret any more, in account of the waiter who've obscured his vision of her.

The waiter had a nice crimson red vest on with a golden tie. He wore a badge and had a simple and yet messy black mustache and beard. He was bald and his skin on his head tends to have a shiny reflection from the hanging light bulbs from the ceiling. He spoke with a raspy Italian voice.

"Good afternoon you two. I am Gasparo and I will be taking care of you tonight. It appears that you have already gotten your drinks from the manager, so I suppose you two are ready to order?"

Eileen fixed her glasses and beamed at the menu.

"Yes, ummm… can I get the… ummm… Oh Rigby, what should I get? The nine inch white pizza or the cheesy parmesan?"

Eileen looked upon Rigby, who was trying to look around Gasparo and spy on the two birds again. The mole tapped his leg with her high heels and got his attention.

"Rigby! Please help me decide what to get! I can't decide!"

Rigby rolled his eyes and glanced at his menu, lowering his brow. He was really getting annoyed by Eileen always involving him in her situations/problems because she was only trying to get closer to him. But he wanted nothing to do with Eileen. He just wanted to be friends with her… just friends.

He moaned and glared at Eileen while his eyes twitched.

"Hmm, maybe you should get the FREAKIN CHEESY PAR-ME-SAN!" And with that intolerable tone, Rigby flipped the menu to cover his annoyed expression. People around them, except for Mordecai and Margaret, glanced at them and were rumoring on what had just occurred. Gasparo coughed the word 'embarrassing' and stood back from the irritated raccoon. Eileen, on the other hand, began to worry for Rigby yet she agreed with Rigby's choice and drew her arms closer to herself. Gasparo grabbed Eileen's menu and slanted his eyes upon the raccoon, who was buried within his menu.

"And… sir? What would you want for tonight?" Rigby slowly raised his head and turned his head up at the waiter. Frustrated as he was, Rigby slammed the menu on the table and grumbled,

"I'll have the spaghetti and meatballs. And make it cheesy please." He then reached for his tea and started slurping it down like a leech. Gasparo grabbed his menu and left without another word.

Eileen stared down Rigby from across the table as she could see him ticked off and at the same time looking to his right again. Eileen knew that Rigby kept looking over at the two love birds but she was trying her hardest to distract him from Margaret. The more Rigby kept looking over, the more Eileen believed that something was really going on between the two of them. And it was killing her heart; killing it softly.

Minutes passes and Rigby and Eileen weren't necessarily saying much to each other. They looked around in different directions and Rigby was tapping the table like a wood pecker. Eileen, as desperate as she was, was thinking about what to say while Rigby was too busy looking over at Mordecai and Margaret.

When Rigby glanced over at Margaret for the fiftieth time, he saw that the avian was staring him down like a hawk. While Mordecai was looking at something else, she pointed at Rigby's face and mouthed,

"Filthy pig." Then she turned back to her original position, acting like nothing had happened.

Rigby squinted his eyes as his veins popped. He gritted his teeth before he heard Eileen spoke out to him.

"Ummm… Rigby, who are you looking at?" Rigby glanced back at the curious mole and fixed himself up.

"Nothing Eileen, just nothing…." He sat there awkwardly with his feet curling underneath the table as he looked off to the side again. But Eileen was staring at him dead on as her eyes started to rise with tears. She couldn't handle the fact that he keeps looking over at Margaret. The depressed mole turned away and glared at Margaret. Her face changed from sorrow to anger as she looked down at the carpet and closed her eyes. Eileen then wiped her tears away and slowly turned herself back forward, just when Rigby had finally got done staring down Margaret. He spoke out,

"Pssh, how long do we have to wait to get our… food?" The mole had some tears flowing down her face as she wiped them and acted like nothing was wrong. Rigby examined Eileen's condition, as he could obviously tell that something was bothering her.

'But what?'

He felt so awkward seeing her this way; and the worst part of it all was that he didn't know what to do. So, Rigby slowly tapped the table and was glancing up and about, trying to think of something to say to stop the incompetent situation.

"Heh heh… So um… you wanna…" immediately just when he said that, Gapsaro, the waiter, was already putting the main courses down in front of them.

"Spaghetti and meatballs, with Extra Cheese, for you! And a cheesy parmesan for you Eileen. Will you be needing anything else for now?"

Rigby looked at Eileen for a response to Gasparo, but she was looking down at her lap and sniffling a little. He tried to get a glimpse at her face but it was covered up by the food in front of her. Rigby motioned for Gasparo to leave and settled up his napkin.

'Hmm… she's probably just tired from all the talking she's committed. I think it's best if I don't say anything to offend her. Oh well.'

He shrugged and took a bite out of his meatball. He then heard some more sniffling from the discouraged mole.

*sniffel* "Rigby…" she spoke weakly, "can I ask you… something?" She looked up and her eyes were drowning in tears. The waves of her sorrow were smearing her make-up as she kept wiping them away in effort to hide her sadness. Rigby was disheartened at the sight of this. Even though he wasn't in love with her, he didn't want her ever to be sad.

"Eilleen, what's wrong? Did I do so-" but she dramatically stopped him on his words.

"NO! Stop pretending you care, Rigby! I know about your secret and I'm tired of being a cover-up!"

Rigby gulped as he started getting nervous from what she was saying.

'What? She doesn't know! I… there's no way that she knows!...'

"Hold on a second Eileen! I do care for you! You need to seriously calm down. I haven't done anything you make you upset with me!"

(Poor choice of words…)

Eileen's sorrowful angry eyes, with rivers of tears flowing down from it, glared down at the raccoon while her glasses seemed to steam a little. Rigby, nervous as he was, has never imagined Eileen getting this furious; in fact, he was sort of frightened by it.

"Eileen, I… Just settle down please, people are watchi-"

Urgently, Eileen grabbed Rigby's unwary arm and tugged him to follow her, which in the fact he didn't dare resist. Their food was the only things that left their table occupied.


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